In 1971, I played the top 20 hit, Walk a Mile in My Shoes, by Joe South, many times on my radio show.  In the chorus, Joe sings, “Walk a mile in my shoes, walk a mile in my shoes; oh, before you abuse, criticize and accuse, walk a mile in my shoes.”

When our kids were in school, I told them often, “Don’t be so quick to judge other kids that have an attitude problem.  You don’t know what their home life is like; you don’t know what they are going through. Be loving and kind.”

I don’t always understand why people act the way they do, so I try to give them the benefit of the doubt. Lord knows I’m not perfect, but I try my best to demonstrate God’s love and perhaps you do too.

If you do, you know what it’s like when you’ve extended love over and over and over for a long period of time, only to be accused and criticized.

In II Corinthians, the Apostle Paul said, “And I will very gladly spend and be spent for you; though the more abundantly I love you, the less I am loved.”

So When Is Enough, Enough?

Are we just supposed to keep loving people even when their response back is hurtful and unkind, when they criticize and accuse?  When is enough, enough?

I know love doesn’t mean compromising your principles. If someone chooses to walk a path contrary to God’s Word, I can still love them, even though we may no longer have a close relationship. I may dearly miss the close company with them, but their choices caused the chasm.

What Do I Do?

I can still pray for them; that’s an act of love.  I can refuse to spread gossip about them to others; that’s an act of love.  When I encounter them, I can conduct myself with mercy, tenderness, and forgiveness; that’s living love.

There are some who insist we must administer reproof, pointing out error wherever we see it. But to what end?  “We must always speak the Word,” some  say. But again, to what end?  What’s the goal:  speaking the Word, or restoring?

The greatest commandment is love.  Jesus taught, first love God, then love others as you love yourself.  The Apostle Paul wrote, “all the law is fulfilled in one word, even in this: thou shalt love thy neighbor as thyself.” He also wrote concerning faith, hope and love, the greatest of those three is love.

What To Speak; When To Speak

God can direct our steps so we know when to back off, remain silent, speak up, get involved, etc. We can’t allow our emotions to dictate our actions. Walking in God’s love is allowing God to work in us and to direct our steps.

At times we simply excuse ourselves from the situation for a period of time.  It may be more beneficial for the other person for us to regroup (before we choke somebody), but really, so we can continue to walk in love toward them.

I’ve never choked anyone, but I’m still human and I try to not let my emotions get in the way. I’ve lived long enough one would think that criticism and accusations wouldn’t still hurt, but they do.  I understand how frustrating it can be at times.

490 Times!

Something that has helped me over the years is the conversation Peter had with Jesus.  Peter wanted to know just how many times he should have to forgive a brother that sinned against him – not a stranger, but his brother.  Peter figured seven times ought to be more than plenty.

Jesus’ answer was short and undeniably powerful.  He simply said, “ I say not unto you, until seven times: but, until seventy times seven.” I did the math. That’s 490 times.

So if my brother, someone close to me, sins against me, even if it totals 490 times, I still need to forgive.

Forgiving someone is always the right thing to do. Why?  Because God has forgiven you, time and time again. We forgive others even as God, for Christ’s sake, has forgiven us. And, never forget that not forgiving someone is very detrimental to your own life.

Forgiveness is a big part of the love of God.

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